Degrees of Seperation

Scripture I'm Reflecting on:  Romans 8:35-37
     "Can anything ever seperate us from Christ's love?  Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitude, or in danger, or threatened with death? No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us."

Reflection:
I decided to post this verse not because it's one I have had an insightful thought or reflection about, but one in which I am struggling deeply with right now.  For some time now, I've felt that every step forward I've taken, I've been met with two steps backward.  Everytime I've felt like a certain prayer had been answered, it comes crashing back in my face.  This has marked a worse extension of this feeling.  I saw what I thought was a "step forward" to a prayer I've had for a while... that over the last day turned into not one or two steps backward, but twenty staircases worth of steps backward.

These steps backward have seperated me from Christ.  Sometimes for just a few minutes of frustration, sometimes for a day sadness, sometimes for even longer.  Currently, this backward fall has left me in a position where I can't even see the end.  I feel myself in a state of seperation now that seems to have potential longevity.  But how can this be?  Paul tells us that overwhelming victory is ours...is mine...through Christ.  If this is true though, where does my seperation come from?

This is an answer I will be dedicating a significant amount of time to finding for the forseeable future.  I know the answer is in this verse.  I know the answer is in the Word.  But I know with where my heart is right now, I'm really going to have to read and pray deeper than the plain language of the Bible to find peace.

The message I guess I hope this passes along is a reminder that troubles, hardships, and our low points in life are not things meant to seperate us from God.  In fact, its probably meant to be the opposite of that.  God doesn't present challenges in our lives to seperate us from Him.  God doesn't lose any love for us during our bad days.  And these hardships do not prevent us from "victory".  They don't prevent us from God's plan.  I lose sight of this very frequently, and the result of losing sight of this is seperation, and a heart thats not at peace.

Final Thought:
My complaints, my faith questioning, over the last 24 hours, has been constant and frequent.  I felt justified in my complaints.  I feel what is happening to me is undeserved, and unfair.

A few hours ago, I received news that a family friend, and someone that helped me out during my college years, fell down his steps and is now in a coma.  Here I am complaining about falling down "emotional" steps, saying "why me".  The reality of how pathetic my complaints were after hearing this news has hit me quite hard.

Be thankful for all of the greatness in your life.  The fact that you are reading this means you are blessed with resources that 90% of the world population does not have.  I am sad that it took news like this for me to realize that my life is still so blessed despite my comparitvely tiny emotional hardships.  Don't let it take someone's misfortunes to realize how blessed you are.  Say prayers of thanks every chance you get.  And say prayers for those around you that they receive all the blessings that you have.